Monday Evening at the Arms

[sensethevisions]

After classes, Phoebe dragged herself to town to the hotel. She was worn out and emotionally drained. She managed to get to her room and she kicked the door shut behind her, but there was a good chance it didn't shut and lock.

She dropped her books and bag on the table and took out her laptop and as it powered up, she got a very quick shower, hoping to ease the ache in her neck. Once out of the shower, she changed inbto something comfortable and settled against the pillows on the bed with her laptop.

She was writing a new story about a girl who was having an affair with a dream demon, only didn't know about it because she thought everything that was happening between them was only happening in her dreams.

Phoebe stared at the screen for a very long time. She wanted this next part to be the pr0n sexy lust-inducing attention-holding and she was stuck as to how to do so.

She was still trying to figure out what to write next when she fell asleep.



[[OOC: Open only to Belthazor or Crowley as they would be the only ones able to get to her.]]

Comments

[sensethevisions]

"The man I love is a demon who used to care about only his own satisfaction!" Phoebe snapped back tears in her eyes. "Damn it, Cole, yeah, I wasn't thinking straight, but he kept fucking hurting you and I wasn't okay with that! Crowley could have demanded anything from me at anytime after that meeting and he didn't...hasn't!" Phoebe kicked at the wall, not the smartest thing in bare feet.

"You're the only sin I've ever wanted. I would never have signed such a thing to get away from you, where in the hell did you get that idea?!"

[demonbelthazor]

"Because that's what Crowley wanted me to believe," Cole said slowly. "He wouldn't let me see you. He let me believe you didn't want to see me. No surprise if he was trying to get you in his bed. And I guess he succeeded," he finished bitterly.

[sensethevisions]

"You...he told you..." Phoebe's face had gone gray. "When did he...why?!"

Phoebe's voice was a wail. "I told him I still loved you! He asked me if I wanted him to kill you and I said NO!" She stared at him. "Cole, you have to believe I never would have...no..."

[demonbelthazor]

Cole took a few steps back from Phoebe and began pacing. "He'd only make an agreement with you if it was in his best interests, Phoebe," he said. "And he's already broken it by provoking me. But if you're sleeping with him, I guess it doesn't really matter."

[sensethevisions]

"I'M NOT CHEATING ON YOU WITH CROWLEY!" Phoebe's wail could probably be heard through the entire hotel.

"Yes, I woke up in bed with him on Sunday morning...and you know what I did? I got dressed and I left the hotel. I ran and went to talk to someone I knew I could be honest with...I needed someone to talk to, to tell what I remembered."

Oh yeah, that would be the sound of her heart breaking and her life being ruined.

"It's so nice to know that you think so much of me that you would believe that I would..." She shoved him against the wall, she was so angry. "Damn you. No matter how hurt I am, I would never be so hateful and vindictive to just jump in bed with someone else like that. ESPECIALLY someone who I was trying to keep from hurting you who I know you hate!"

[demonbelthazor]

"So what were you doing in bed with him?" Cole shouted. He let her hit him, not responding with any violence of his own. She couldn't physically hurt him much. It was emotionally that she could do the most damage.

[sensethevisions]

"I don't know!" Phoebe yelled back at him, knowing how weak that sounded. "The last thing I remember was getting ready to jump off that balcony and Crowley talking to me about Grace and redemption, then him taking me down so I couldn't jump!"

[demonbelthazor]

"If I'm driving you to suicide and you're being saved by an evil demon, then maybe I should just go," Cole said, resigned. "All we're doing is causing each other pain now."

[sensethevisions]

"No...don't...please?"

Phoebe sighed. "I don't know what happened to me Saturday night...I don't remember, Cole."

Phoebe let go of him and stepped back, going to sit on the bed.

"I honestly don't. I just...there was a large bottle of tequila, that i thought had come from you and then...I woke up in his bed."

[demonbelthazor]

"Are you sure he didn't do anything to you to get you there?" Cole asked suspiciously. "Or were you willing?"

[sensethevisions]

"Why would I have sex with someone besides you, Cole?" She asked flatly. "Even if you hate me right now, you know enough about me to know that I don't sleep around."

[demonbelthazor]

"Maybe you've developed a taste for demons," Cole said, then regretted his rash words when he saw the hurt on Phoebe's face. "Look," he said, "we're not together so I have no right to be upset about who you are with. So, uh, whatever makes you happy."

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe felt like he had just slapped her. "I'm not *with* anyone," she said softly, her voice going flat and empty again. "There's only one person I want to be with, but I guess I fucked that all up."

She swallowed, then looked at him. "Even if you hate me, please, help me find out who pretended to be you Saturday night, then? I believe you when you say it wasn't you, but that means that someone pretended to be you to try and cause my death. Someone wanted me dead bad enough to use the most powerful weapon in their arsenal against me."

She tried not to beg.

"After we do that...I'll be moving back to San Francisco. It seems that in trying to protect you, I hurt you worse...and I still don't know how I ended up in bed with Crowley." She met his eyes. "Before I leave, I'll permanently destroy those entries in the Book, and I won't tell Prue or Grams about you, either."

[demonbelthazor]

"You don't have to go, Phoebe," Cole said, stopping his pacing and looking at her. "I'm the one who doesn't belong here. Everyone hates me anyway. I should leave. You can finish school here."

[sensethevisions]

"I don't want to be here without you," she finally confessed. "I still love you and being here without you...I can't." She stood and moved to his side, hesitantly touching his arm expecting him to jerk away from her touch.

"I meant what I said when I told you there would never be another one for me. This is where I met you, where you loved me. I can't stay."

[demonbelthazor]

You could be with me if you really wanted it, Cole thought in despair.

He nodded. "Yeah. Maybe it's best if we both go and start over somewhere else."

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe was rocked by his emotions and her eyes filled with tears again as her chest constricted, cutting off her air..

He doesn't love me any longer.

She swallowed, not believing she's about to do this. "I can't stay where I'm not wanted any longer, Cole."

[demonbelthazor]

"Want has little to do with this anymore," he said softly.

[sensethevisions]

"You can't even stand to be near me," she said sadly. "I hurt you so badly..."

[demonbelthazor]

"What do you expect?" Cole said. "You broke up with me. Being near you is kinda like pouring salt on the wounds. I don't know what to do anymore."

[sensethevisions]

"For me, too. I made a mistake...and that led to a big mess."

[demonbelthazor]

Yeah, that mistake was me, Cole thought unhappily.

"Guess the only thing we can do is move on then," he said. "Finish the year and figure out what to do from there."

[sensethevisions]

"I shouldn't have left you," she said softly, looking down as her own despair rose up in her. She sighed. "Do you want me to move into the spare room or just out of the Attic completely?"

[demonbelthazor]

"You didn't have a choice," Cole said bluntly. "I can't keep my promises to you. I have to do things you don't want me to do."

[sensethevisions]

"And I have to do the same thing," she said and shook her head. "There is only one promise I ever really wanted from you...and no it wasn't the one about Veronica."

Phoebe went to look out the window and then turned back to him.