Saturday Night At The Arms

[sensethevisions]

After Crowley had brought her back from Caritas the night before, Phoebe had stayed in bed for a long time. The magical workings of the snow demons had given her headaches just like the zombies had before.

Phoebe had stayed behind closed doors during the fight. She had no offensive powers and didn't know where to find weapons in the hotel. She had been scared to death because she knew Cole would be in the midst of the fighting.

She kept looking at the hotel phone and with a soft sigh, she reached for it. He may want Piper and not her, now, but she had to know he was safe and hadn't been hurt in the fighting.

She cradled the phone in her lap and dialed the familiar number. She would make sure he was okay, and then she would find something to eat and curl up on the couch in front of the fireplace and try to rest.

"..." There was silence for a moment, then a sad voice starts speaking. "It's Phoebe...I know you probably don't want to talk to me...but I just...I needed to know you were okay after the attacks today..."

There were instances in the conversation where she was reminded that he was no longer hers and it opened up wounds that she had thought were starting to heal. By the time the conversation was over, tears were streaming down her cheeks. She let the phone drop down into her lap and curled up on the couch, trying to stop the flow of tears before Crowley saw her.

She was supposed to be tough and if he found her crying again, he might regret that he given her sanctuary...but it just hurt so much that their love was over. She would always love him...but if he really wanted Piper, she'd do her best to be happy for them.

She wrapped herself up in the blanket on the couch cried herself into exhaustion. It hurt so much to breathe and she couldn't understand how someone could hurt so much and still be alive.

She wanted to go to Piper and be comforted by her big sister...but she and Cole...attic...drinking together last night...

So, no, not calling on Piper for comfort right now. It wouldn't be fair. She couldn't call Paige, either.

She could call Camulus...but that wouldn't be fair to him.

She wondered if Crowley had tequila in here?

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[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

There is a knock on her door, and it swings open as if it wasn't shut tight. He's standing in the doorway with a bottle of tequila and a brown paper bag.

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Phoebe hears the door open and looks up from where she is laying on the couch. She is silent for a moment as she stares at him through her tears.

"C-Cole?" she questions hopefully with a sob as she attempts to stumble to her feet. "Love..?"

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He steps through the door with an enigmatic smile. Setting the bottle and bag down, he kneels on the floor beside the couch without a word.

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Still having a hard time believing he's there, Phoebe wraps her arms around his neck and buries her face in his shoulder.

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He wraps his arms around her waist, stroking her back gently.

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She holds him to her, just saying his name over and over again.

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He grins and pulls her closer, kissing her softly on her forehead.

Without a word, he rises, carrying her to bed. Laying down with her, his hands trail across her stomach and up her breastbone to softly cup her jaw.

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Phoebe curls close to him running her hands along his chest and his sides, making sure that he's really here.

"So sorry...so scared."

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"Shhh." He kisses along her jaw, across her cheeks, and against her eyes. He closes his eyes and tries not to grin as his hands caress up and down her body.

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Phoebe whimpers at his touch. "Cole...I miss you..." Her eyes are closes and she feels. "I love you so much."

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"Oh, pe--" he cuts off his slip of the tongue with a hungry kiss against her neck. Moving up just a bit, he whispers softly in her ear.

"I love you too, Piper."

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Phoebe jumps back and her eyes widen.

"Piper..."

Phoebe scrambles off of the bed, grabbing a lamp and throwing it at his head.

"You bastard!" She screams in a broken voice. "You bastard." She looks for something else to throw at him as she feels everything within her shatter completely.

Crowley was wrong. She wasn't strong enough to deal with this.

She looks around the suite wildly. "I was going to ask Crowley to take me home...and you..."

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

As the lamp shatters against his skull, he winces, then looks at her pleading. "I...I..." but he hangs his head, contrite in knowing he'd said just the right wrong thing. He shimmers away, leaving her all alone.

In his own room, the Demon buries his face in his pillow as he cackles with glee. The tequila is there, as are limes and salt, and if he waits patiently and doesn't slip up again, he'll get just what he wants.

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe drops to her knees, not knowing how he could have...how she...

Her soulmate...her own sister!!

Phoebe buries her face in her hands screaming out in pain. She screams until her voice is hoarse and then there is only the gasping breaths left in her.

She crawls over to the table and throws the bag from Cole into the fireplace and opens the tequila bottle. She stares into in for a moment and then tilts her head back, taking a long pull from the bottle and coughing when she pulls it away.

She moves to the chair by the window and stares out into the darkness for a long time. She takes another drink from the bottle, and then flicks the latch on the window and steps out onto the balcony.

She climbs up and perches on the railing, looking down at the ground below before taking another drink. The street was empty ... just as empty as she was feeling inside her self.

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

The scream tore through him and he smiled, hard and cruel. Nearly there.

He heard the latch click, and watched out his own window.
Almost...

And then he saw her climb on top of the railing, tequila coursing through her. As if he hadn't planned out her utter destruction, he opened his own door slowly and with the softest, gentlest tone...

"Dearest, sweet Phoebe. Come down. Come to me." He offers his hand and swallows hard...not from worry but because her utter torment is making his mouth water.

[sensethevisions]

"You were wrong," she whispers without turning to look at him. "I'm not strong enough to deal with this. Sorry to disappoint, but I'm not. He has taken everything away from me, and yet I still love him, still ache. He came to see me. I don't know how he got in, but he did." She takes another drink.

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"My dear, I'm so very sorry. I told him to stay away. Told him you were in my care. I've failed you."

He moves toward her slowly, his hands open and in front and his wings standing ready to burst forth in case she falls...or worse, jumps.

"You know, poppet, if you're empty now, there is nowhere to go but up. Let me help you dear. Take my hand." He reaches up to her...always her choice.

[sensethevisions]

"You didn't fail anyone, Crowley," she says softly as she takes another drink. "You said yourself that humans can be much crueler to each other than yu ever could."

She sighs, looking down. "It's funny, I know you're not sweetness and light and you're a very old, evil and powerful demon, yet it was to you that I ran to when this all started. Now, now I'm honestly considering another sin...and here, I'm supposed to be a Charmed One. I'm not anything that I thought I was." Phoebe closes her eyes. "Not anything."

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

"Sweet, you are everything you thought you were...and then some. You've only just lost your faith. I can help you, pet. Trussst me." His voice buzzes with seduction as he closes the distance and puts his arms around her to keep her from falling.

"You've been devoted to an idea of goodness and love, my dear. That's noble and I applaud your efforts...but evil is so much more constant in this world. You can keep on fighting against it," he smiles at her softly, "or you can come down and I'll show you what sin really is."

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Phoebe is silent for a long time. "Death, or betraying my heritage," she says softly. She looks down at the ground. "All I wanted was to be loved and be held...and then all of this happened."

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

"Those aren't your only options, my dear. You can live, you can uphold your heritage...and you can be so much more than held and loved. There is adoration. There is devotion. With the right help, Phoebe, you could be so very powerful. You could be my downfall, you know."

He blinks slowly and grins, taking her by the hand and pulling her gently to him.

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Phoebe collapses against Crowley and sighs softly. "It hurts so much, Crowley."

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

"Yes, precious. I know it does. Consider this your Fall, which is something I know entirely too well. I can help you, Phoebe. I can help you work on your own redemption. HE'll take you back, unlike me. Would you like my help, dear? I ssswear it will get better."

[sensethevisions]

"Redemption?" Phoebe asks hopefully.

[flash-serpent.livejournal.com]

"Yes, lovely one, redemption. You always have the choice, my dear. As tired and hollow as you are, you always have the strength...the power...it's inside you even if you can't find it." He searches through everything he knows about her, grasping at things to tempt her, "I'm certain your Gram would tell you the same thing. We who care for you can see it, even when you can't, darling girl."